literature

Winter Soldier x Reader (28)

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Literature Text

It was so loud. And there was nowhere to hide.
The people kept talking. They wouldn’t stop. All the papers they had and vials and needles were important to them. The people always had them when they were watching you. Like the needle that was sticking out of your arm. What they gave to you from the needle made everything feel nice. Instead of this light, there should have been darkness to hide in.

”Who are you?”

Oh. One of the people was talking... not to the other people, but to you. What was he saying? Who were you? Didn’t he know? He was the doctor. You shook your head and watched how his head turned. These people sure did act funny. Maybe they were different. But what did other people act like? Were you the one that was different?
The doctor pulled a chair up to yours and sat in it. There was some more papers in his lap; so important. Was he going to speak to you? They never really spoke to you, they were always too busy watching.

”I am Doctor Lounze. Now, I’m going to show you pictures. Tell me if you know anyone in the pictures, alright?” He smiled as you nodded your head up and down. The first picture was of a man dressed in bright colors. Colors you never saw around here. His shield had a star on it. It looked pretty cool, but you didn’t know him.
You shook your head.
The next picture was of a woman with brightly colored hair and dark clothes.
You shook your head.
Next came a picture of another man with an eyepatch, and after that a man with a cool beard, a man with glasses, and a man with light hair.
Each time, you shook your head. They were just pictures.
Finally, he lifted up the last picture. A man encased in ice, sleeping like you never did. His hair was a little longer than the rest of the guys, and there was something shiny and metallic on the left side of his body. A... metal arm. Half of a star was painted on the shoulder, bright red like blood...
For some reason, you couldn’t shake your head. You knew this person. The people told you that this was the place for you- in this chair, all strapped down. But the energy source in your heart sparked excitedly when it saw his image. You remembered the curve of his lips when he smiled, and the feeling of his arms tight around you. The memories made your heart plummet.

Oh my god.

Bucky.

What had they done?! You were forgetting him, you were letting your sick bastard father win! Oh god, this was some horrible nightmare. For a moment, you almost forgot... you almost forgot! They had Bucky, they had him frozen and dead and this torture was unbearable!

”No... no no no,” you whimpered, yanking on the straps on your wrists. This goddamned wheelchair, the goddamed IV, it was all so damn horrible! “NO!” You screamed. “BUCKY! LET ME GO, LET HIM GO!” It all came back so quickly. Cal’s death, Bucky’s extraction, the days of darkness, the surgery, the pain, the memory-loss hormone... they were trying to kill you without making you dead.

Because you had power that you wouldn’t be able to control.  

”Double the dose of the hormone! Now! Quickly!” The sharp orders left the mouth of your own father. How could he be so cruel? The blue flashes started sparking from your fingertips as something inside you pulsed with energy. It was so strange, like your heart was beating twice as fast in order to synchronize with a horrible pulsing that emanated from your chest. It hurt, but you felt the energy bend under your will. Making the blue power lash out at the people around you was as easy as moving your hand in a glove.

Now!”

You felt more fluid pump into your veins and your mind started to go foggy. You were so... sleepy. But you could never sleep. Why were you angry again? Where were you? What was going on? All the people looked so frantic. Was something wrong? They turned their backs on you with hushed whispers before the nice doctor wandered over to you.

”Who are you?”
What was he saying? Who were you? Didn’t he know? He was the doctor.

~~

“I am so glad you are finally with us.” The man named Doctor Lounze smiled at you. “There are still some inconsistencies we need to work out, but you are nearly the finished product. Can you speak?”

The voice you heard next was quiet and shaky, hardly a solid answer for a good doctor like him. It was yours. “Yes.”

”Wonderful,” he pulled the needle out of your arm and wrapped a nice bandage around the hurt. “Do you know who you are, dear?”
Did you? No. Everything was like the light around you; white and absent of everything. Wasn’t that normal? Maybe he knew.

”No.”

”Such a pity too. It could have been different you know.” The doctor laughed before composing himself. “You, my dear, are a beacon of light in this dark day. A beautiful creation of infinity and science. You were designed to make the world a better place. To take life so better life can grow. We will have many things for you to do to fulfill your beautiful purpose. You are the hope.”

”I am the hope.” It sounded nice... but it sounded wrong. As if someone handed you a scalpel and called it a screwdriver. Like what the people used on you sometimes. The sound of the words tasted wrong in your mouth.
But the doctor was right. He had to be right.
A woman walked in then, a face that reminded you of something that you couldn’t quite grasp. She had a sly smile and a strut in her step. She wasn’t like the doctors; she was donning an outfit entirely different from everyone else you’d seen.

”Holy shit,” she remarked, gazing at you with a fascinated smile. “You really took out little sis’s bolts.”

”It was less taking them out and more numbing them.” The doctor sighed. “So far, we haven’t been able to do any permanent blanking with the hormone. Our next idea is a process of using electroshock and the hormone so her body will produce it all on it’s own.”

”Electroshock? A bit harsh, don’tcha think?” The woman put her hands on her hips, evaluating you. “I like it.”

”Please, Lisalle. If you want to continue the dirty work, please take this seriously.”

”Look at her, Lounze! She doesn’t remember her own sister’s face!”
Wait. Was she talking about you? Did you even have a sister? It confused you, but you said nothing. Saying things always came with a lot of pain.

”That’s enough, Lisalle. If you trigger any of her memories, she will react with severe emotional outlash. I’m not getting things done fast enough. The superiors are getting impatient. We still haven’t apprehended the Winter Soldier. There is much to do.”

”So?” The woman, along with you, watched as the doctor’s smile faded.

”So get working or you’ll end up just like your little sister.”


S.H.I.E.L.D.

”Everything is ready, Captain Rogers.”

Lying still didn’t feel right. But he knew it was for the greater good. When Bucky vanished again, it left them nothing to work with. But what he said reminded all of them that someone they knew and loved was in serious danger. After convincing Director Fury that HYDRA could have been making (Name) into something potentially harmful to SHIELD, he complied to a rescue mission. It was very low key. But necessary.

”Thank you, Agent Hill,” he said. Brandishing his shield in one hand, he strode up the walk and into the jet where Natasha, Clint, and Tony Stark would be waiting. Other agents were coming too, people willing to give up their lives to help.

Natasha seemed to take notice of Steve’s downcast mood, as she seated herself beside him. It would do well for inconspicuous conversation.

”Look,” she began. “After this, we’ll find Bucky again. All he wanted was to help her, remember? He’ll come back.”

”If she doesn’t come back, he won’t.” He looked down. “Buck’s changed. And if something happened to her, he would never forgive us for not helping when we had the chance. It’s pretty obvious that she got through to him. She was the key to my best friend.”

”Everything is going to be alright. I doubt they’ve done anything... permanent to her. It’s only been a few days, remember? And Barnes said that they didn’t execute her like they did her brother.”

”Yeah... he did.”

Her words did very little to ease his troubled mind. As the jet lifted up and off, it became clear that there was a slim chance this would turn out okay. But it was a chance nonetheless. The hopelessness of people like the Director made him nostalgic to the time when he was faced with the choice to rescue Bucky or disobey orders.
Well, he was doing this for a reason.

Ohhhhh this is painful to write. <333 Bucky's MIA, but things are at least going to change. 
© 2014 - 2024 kawaiinothing
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SoIIy's avatar
wow thats quiet confusing but rly rly well writte omg! loooove it <3